Persistent Weed

I sit at my desk, waiting for the students to arrive. I have forty-five minutes and I'm all prepared. I just got back from a five day off work yet I am feeling exhausted. My eyes wandered at the four corners of my classroom. It's tidy and everything is in their right places. Right places. I felt a sudden pang putting me in this deafening secluded place alone questioning myself : Am I in the right place?

This question keeps on popping up. No matter how I search for answers, they're still out of grasp. What I do know is that I love my current job. But, why would I think about "my right place" if there's nothing I'm looking for deep in my heart? I know, there is always somewhere for me so does everyone else. Despite doing something meaningful each day, there's an empty space waiting to be filled within me.

I am in point of feeling stuck at one place. I feel like flying and soaring the skies but I have no wings. There are ways for us to be able to fly and soar the world. I just have to find out my own. Too many questions. I am shattered into different pieces but I am not in pain. I need to recollect my dreams and ideas to make a bigger picture of  the person I really want to be and where I want to be.

I sit here idle only with thoughts about the true purpose of my life. What do I do to shed some light in the cloudy horizon I sometimes in. I'm too occupied. I am paranoid of sorts. I over think things and I forget to give my self it needs to not fret about the future. But that's jut me- a worrier and it's my weakest point.

What if things were different. Would I be looking for something else? Am I just homesick? I don't know. Ah!!! being a human being. Too many questions we can't find answers. We just forget them but then again they come like a persistent weed.